1. That my desire is not sufficiently sincere.

2. That it does not flow from a sufficiently deep and sensible acquaintance with my own vileness, littleness, unworthiness, and foolishness.

3. That I do not pray for a manifested salvation as if I really and truly felt it to be the only thing that can satisfy my soul.

4. That I may have been deceived, and that my first step in the divine life may have been a false one; and if so, then I am become one of that company against whom has gone out the denunciation of thieves and robbers."

5. That it may have been nothing more than a few sparks of false fire, kindled, fed, and fostered by a deceived heart; and that I may justly anticipate that my ultimate destiny will be to "lie down in sorrow.'

In opposition to these fears and suspicions, I have sometimes a small measure of hope that the kingdom of the Lord, which is to endure for ever, has been begun; for I can very clearly remember the day, the time, the place, and the circumstance, when, where, and how those words fell upon my heart, separating me at once from a crowd of ungodly people with whom I had been mixing up: "Verily, verily, I say unto thee, except a man be born again, he cannot enter into the kingdom of heaven." And I well recollect the time and place, when, if I am not greatly deceived, after enduring many painful feelings, having my soul filled with the terrors of hell, the fear of death, and the avenging eye of justice blazing through a broken law, I was freed from all my grief, heaviness, fears, terrors, horrors, darkness, despondency, and guilt, by the shining in of one sweet gleam of light, which set me at ease, and begot in me a desire to depart and be with the Lord, as I then felt a sweet and delightful assurance (for the moment it lasted) that I should one day be with him, to behold him as he is, and to be like him. Since then, however, I have been the subject of many distracting fears as to its reality, and whether it came down from heaven; for it has often been suggested to me that it was the devil who appeared as an angel of light to deceive me into the notion, that "I was a vessel of mercy afore prepared unto glory."

Notwithstanding, however, the many and painful buffetings I have been exercised with, both as to that and other sweet moments I have been at times (though rarely) favoured with, I cannot quite relinquish the hope that they were "from above;" and though I have had often to lament my many shortcomings, my unbelief, worldliness, carnality, proneness to evil, and many infirmities, as well also my legality, self-sufficiency, pride, and manifold departures from the Lord in thought, feeling, desire, word, and deed; notwithstanding all these evils and infirmities, which are a source of daily lamentation, wretchedness, grief, and sorrow, I cannot give up my hope. I have designed to relinquish all thought, care, anxiety, and concern about divine things, but cannot; and I can truly and sincerely affirm, that there are times when I would not for all the world calls good or great. I feel that I cannot give it up, for, even in my

heaviest moments, I trust that there is a little good in me towards the Lord God of Israel, even if it be only in desire.

"Marks of grace I cannot show,

All polluted is my breast;

Yet I weary am I know,

And the weary long for rest."

I long ardently, earnestly, and anxiously for an enjoyment of the sweet and soul-refreshing repose, of which the church speaks in Solomon's Song: "I sat down under his shadow with great delight." And I cannot give it up, because I trust that I am not altogether destitute of some divine testimonies. It is written, Thy testimonies are very sure."

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I. I have had a sin-convincing testimony which I thought was very sure, i. e. 'The thought of foolishness is sin; He that offends in one point is guilty of all; and "The soul that sinneth it shall die."

2. I have had an encouraging testimony, which was, "It is good for a man both to hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the Lord."

3. I have had (I trust) a delivering testimony, “The blood of Jesus Christ cleanseth from all sin."

4. I am not a stranger to a reproving testimony, "Let him reprove me, and I will esteem it as an excellent oil." I have been reproved for my deadness in prayer, and in all the services of the sanctuary; for my want of devotion to God, and decision for his truth and holy and reverend name; for my many vain and foolish thoughts, expressions, and worldly conversations; for my hard feelings against an offending brother or sister; and for my lukewarmness and apathy towards" things pertaining to the life to come."

5. I have also known the happiness of receiving a restoring testimony; “I will heal their backslidings," and "love them freely."

6. I have had a reviving testimony when sunk very low, and almost into despair, through being unable to trace or discover any mark indicative of spiritual life.

Now, these testimonies I have found to be " very sure," inasmuch as they were "sure" to effect the work they were divinely appointed to do. Now, although I have been favoured with these testimonies, I cannot rest on them or in them, but feel daily more and more of my need to rest on and in a higher, safer, stronger, and more permanent Resting-place. I see that on nothing short of the “munition of rocks" can I rest the weighty and important concerns of my immortal soul; that everything else is fleeting, failing, and withering away, and that He alone is the sure place of repose, refuge, and rest, who is the same yesterday, to-day, and for ever.'

My paper being full, I must forbear making any further remarks at this time. I have just penned down what I have felt, known, and experienced, in which I trust you will be able to discover whether the "secret of the Lord" is with me or not.

I remain, my dear Friend,

Yours sincerely in the truth,

Warrington, October 15th, 1846.

S. S.

THIS IS THE WAY; WALK YE IN IT.

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Dear Friend,—I am still constrained to hang upon a full, free, finished, and everlasting salvation, though it is often with trembling. In truth, I have nothing else to trust in or hang upon (nor do I want anything else) but that salvation which was settled by the eternal Three-in-One before time began, in the everlasting purposes of love, grace, and faithfulness in Christ, and executed by him in the fulness of time; as it is written, “Lo, I come, in the volume of the book it is written of me, to do thy will, O God!" Thy law is within my heart." "By the which will we are sanctified." True it is, the whole church were sanctified, or set apart, by God the Father, when he, by an act of inconceivable grace, chose them in Christ, and blessed them with all spiritual blessings in him before all time. O precious salvation ! "But the bliss of it is known to us by tasting." And what shall we say, as feeling inwardly persuaded at times that we have some solid scriptural and experimental reasons to believe that the Lord hath blessed us with that hope of which he is the Author and Finisher, that rests solely on the Person, blood, and merits of the Lord Jesus Christ, and waits as it is drawn forth into exercise at the footstool of mercy for the fulfilment of the promise? And though sometimes darkness, sin, guilt, temptation, and Satan, meet the soul when it attempts to call upon God, and the Accuser will go just as far to accuse and distress the soul as the Lord suffers him, while, it may be, hope seems almost gone, and the soul trembles before the Lord lest it should be a castaway at last? But hope is fixed, faith is fixed, love is fixed, trusting in the Lord. He knows there is no salvation in any other. This he is at a point about, for it has been demonstrated with power in the conscience of that person who has by the Holy Ghost been led to Sinai, and who has heard God speaking out of the thick darkness. Here it is that the Lord in sovereign mercy cuts down all the carnal, fleshly, self-righteous hopes and doings of a sinner; yes, he feels by painful experience that he is in quite as deplorable a state as the infant spoken of by Ezekiel; and now, Save, Lord, or I perish!" issues from his throbbing breast, as brought forth by felt inward necessity.

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Thus the Lord makes a way for his great salvation to be manifested in the conscience; and such are made his witnesses indeed and in truth. They have the testimony of the Spirit within; and this, with his word in the letter thereof, as read under the bedewing influences of the Holy Ghost, most sweetly harmonise in the soul when the salvation of the Lord is manifested with divine power in the conscience. O! when the blood of Christ is applied to the conscience, and his righteousness is brought nigh and put upon the soul, and the blessed Spirit makes him inwardly feel and rejoice in the unspeakably precious truth, that he is cleansed and pardoned by the former, and freely justified from all things by the latter, from which he could not be by the law of Moses, none but those who

have been brought as lepers indeed by the blessed Spirit to Jesus the Mediator, and to the blood of sprinkling, know its unspeakably precious power and effects. O this is the blood that, when brought by divine power into the conscience, removes guilt and condemnation, silences all the claims of law and justice, and causes Satan to fly before it. Joy and peace unspeakable flow into the soul, and it is lost in holy amazement at the infinite love, grace, and condescension of Israel's Three-One God, that he should stoop so low to ransom and bring them nigh even to himself, aye, into some sweet experimental knowledge of himself as a sin-pardoning, guilt-removing, and souljustifying God in and through Christ, sealing his loving-kindness in the heart, and binding up the testimony by a little of the precious power of the Holy Ghost. Here a poor sinner is indulged to know something of communion and fellowship with a covenant God in Christ, and of its soul-humbling, sin-subduing effects; he is hereby crucified to the world, and the world unto him. Communion and fellowship with the Lord Jesus Christ, at his feet, in his word, and in meditation, is what he wants; nor is he for a time (as the Lord sees good) denied this precious privilege.

My soul has longed to depart, when in this spot, and be with Christ. But no, I must stop and learn a little of the deceitfulness of my depraved heart, and groan under it, too, again and again; and prove, too, something of the subtlety, craft, and power of Satan's insinuations and temptations in times of soul darkness. O! when the Lord is pleased to withhold the light of his countenance, when the power of the blessed Spirit is not put forth in the soul so as to keep Satan at a distance, and to keep the soul nigh unto God, with some sweet confidence in his mercy; O! when a cloud comes between God and the soul, and it cannot see its way, and beginning to sink in its feelings, doubts and fears arise, Satan then will use all his subtlety and power, as far as he is suffered. But the Lord reigneth, and blessed be his name! He hath so overruled these things in and for the good of my soul, that he hath caused me to lie at his feet, sometimes pouring my complaint in groanings that I could not utter; and sometimes he has secretly communicated a little power to my fainting soul, so that I have been enabled to put him to his word. And O! when power is given to a poor soul to plead with God, so that it cannot let him go, it is a token for good indeed, that he shall have the desires of his heart, as far as they are in accordance with the will of the Lord; and the poor soul proves, by feeling and vital testimony, that where the word of a king is there is power. O yes! King Jesus still speaks with authority in and to the hearts of his people by the power of the Holy Ghost, and the devils still tremble before him.

But I am forgetting that I have almost scribbled to the end of my paper. I had no thought, when I sat down to write to you, of going back to the outset; my mind and feelings seemed brought to trace the dealings of the Lord with me latterly, and I was going to try to tell you a little of it. But as soon as I took up the pen to write, all was gone, I had nothing to say, and felt necessitated

to tell the Lord so, and ask him to give me a word to say in his fear. With respect to present feelings and exercises with things within and without, I am often bowed down and perplexed, and have many times tried to unbosom my soul before the Lord, and could not-have gone sighing to my employment, and sometimes have not known what I have been doing. Nevertheless, the Lord has at times made his word sweet to my soul. How sweet the word of the Lord is when he is pleased to bring it into the heart with a little sweetness and power! Then the soul sings again feelingly, "His mercy endureth for ever!" Thus you will perceive I can walk in humility and godly fear only as the Lord is pleased to hold up my goings in his paths.

Grace, mercy, and peace be with you and all the living family of faith!

Bedworth, June, 1844.

W. L.

THE HEAVENLY PILOT.

Dear Brother in the Lord Jesus,-Your kind communication of Christian sympathy towards me in my present affliction, while it warmed my heart, also detected my infancy in divine things; and to frame an answer I feel not at all able. Oh! the barren and unfeeling heart within! Its hardness and deceitfulness ofttimes stare me in the face, when light shines through the life and on the pathway of a fellow-traveller like yourself.

I know if the Holy Ghost had not rescued my soul from a mere profession of chapel-going, that I should have been called by many a very pious young man, and what not. Yet now being delivered from the delusion of creature-doing, I find the religion of Jesus a secret known only to a few poor, helpless, naked, and lost sinners,- -a treasure of knowledge transcendently excellent, a warfare in which spiritual weapons are given to fight in the strength of Omnipotence, a feast of fat things, and a matter of espousal between the soul and the Lord Jesus; its consummation determined on when every elect member of his glorious body will openly, personally, and mutually, share in the everlasting flow of Jehovah's love in Christ the Beloved, in whom we are accepted; and the pledge of our sure acceptance is the secret of the Lord that is with them that fear him. I often think what a mercy it is when we are in any measure uneasy in soul matters; for if we only had the hope of the majority of so called Christians, without soul trouble, through the work of the Holy Ghost, we should resemble the man that built his house upon the sand, and like him we should perish in our own deceivings.

I was without any particular outward trouble since leaving you till last night, and then a storm came on; but through the billows and wind that arose my Pilot steered my poor bark, and I was not wrecked, but braced up in the nerves of a renewed and happy mind. For a moment or two I continued to live it all out.