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TO THE SAME. A STRIKING
ENMITY OF MAN'S HEART TO GOD, AND OF THE
WORKINGS OF THE POWER BY WHICH ALONE IT
CAN BE SUBDUED.
MY DEAR WILLIAM,
I am glad to catch a moment's leisure, and to employ it in writing to you. Let me speak without particular design, and apply it if you are able. What do I find within me? Principles most unreasonable, neither directing me to God, nor consequently to happiness. Principles which have debased my understanding to an aptitude only for the mean regards of the world. Principles which tend alone to gratify something in me I call self; a monster that ungods God, and will have the whole of creation at its command; a haughty monster, big with self-sufficiency; a monster that knows neither pity nor gratitude; pregnant with envy, rage, revenge, that bears intent of murder to every opposing man or woman ; a lazy monster which would have all nature sacrifice to its indulgence. Principles, atheistical because self-idolatrous; which deny the blessed God to have either justice, mercy, holiness, wisdom, or truth; which confront his superintendence and government with the most determined hatred; which demand an eternal separation from every thing that is called God, because they cannot endure submission, and the thought of parting from the present scene. Miraculous love
divine sees and pities such a wretch.
interposes to rescue me, however unwilling to be delivered, restored, made happy. I see and approve the sufficient contrivance that reconciles such a God to such a monster; that inspires the glorious principles of liberty, the only liberty, that of serving God. Man, a creature, must be a servant: how much better to serve the Most High, than to be a slave to lust! That gives me eyes to see this my deformity of heart, to lament this my misery; that furnishes me with an arm to overmatch this accursed God-dishonouring flesh. But how hard to apply this remedy! Either I seem not to want it, or I dispute its sufficiency, when I discern my helplessness. When I have taken it to me a moment, and am pleased with my deliverance, suddenly it is gone; the inbred monster awakes, scatters darkness over my eyes, disputes, contends, insists on gratification; the pleasing scene is departed, I am confusion, I am robbed of peace; I startle, and would return to God and comfort, but intercepting objects step in between, or unbelieving suspicion makes my darkness greater. I reflect what I am; I look in and charge my native corruption; I complain to God; he sets me free; but I am not safe a moment, and expect the clouds again.
Happy the case of those who are gone to the better country! For this happy above all, they have dropt the flesh in the grave! Why then shrink at death, when death only can make my freedom perfect, unchangeable, eternal! Ah! faithless flesh still hangs Come Jesus deliver me now, give me this freedom, that I may long to be free indeed and for ever. I do not know what you will make of this rhap
sody, but I love to write to you at my ease, being sincerely,
The solemn views entertained by Mr. Walker of the ministerial office, and how seriously he urged them upon others, may be seen in the subjoined extracts from his letters of advice to a young man just about to take orders. "I remember," he says, "the week before my ordination, I spent with the other candidates, as dissolute, I fear, as myself, in a very light indecent manner, dining, supping, drinking, and laughing together, when God knows we should have been on our knees, and warning each other to fear for our souls, in the view of what we were to put our hands to. I cannot but attribute the many careless ungodly years I have spent in pleasure since, to this profane introduction; and believe me, dear Sir, the review shocks me :—while I write, I tremble in the recollection of the wounds I then gave Jesus. Were I to pass that awful transaction again, I hope it would, I am sure it would be, in a very different manner. would be, as much as possible, alone in prayer and humiliation. If I could find none deeply impressed with the ordination, I would have nothing to do with them; or if I could find any, I should still take care to be mostly alone. I would, again and again, pray over many passages of Scripture relating to the ministerial office, particularly the epistles to Timothy and Titus, and also the ordination offices, both of them : I would pass two days of the week fasting; I would
commit to paper all my present views, that I might after have recourse to them. I would seek to obtain
the most distinct and lively impressions of the importance of the ministerial office to God, myself, and others; in short, I would do nothing the whole week, but what would dispose me, with all seriousness, sincerity, and heartiness, so to undertake the office, as I should wish I had done when standing before the judgment. I would therefore recommend such a conduct to you; and would observe that your steadiness herein, in opposition to the reproaches it may bring upon you, and the risings of shame in your own heart contending for compliance, will be the best proof you can have of faith, and a happy ground of hope that you will not afterwards be ashamed of the gospel, when you shall be an ambassador for Christ. The case will be the very reverse, if you comply."
What appeared to him to be of more immediate moment, for the consideration of one just about to receive authority to become a messenger of Jesus Christ, he comprised "under these three points."
"1. A right sense of the importance of your officeas it regards Christ who honours you with so distinguished a station in his church, and commits to you, in so interesting a degree, the care of his gospel, which will be abundantly disgraced, or as you may reasonably hope, be glorified through you, as you are faithful or otherwise. The titles which will belong to you as a minister, do awfully display this. The Scriptures term you 'a servant of Christ'-' a watchman'— 'a steward''a shepherd'—' an ambassador,' &c.; titles which greatly shew, if duly considered and at
tended to, in the full scope of what such expressions signify, how much Christ entrusts with you.-As it regards the souls to whom you shall minister, and the whole church of Christ, as far as your influence shall reach. The souls of the people, especially your own, will be in an awakening connection with your diligence, faithfulness, exemplariness. Your own people at least will hearken to none but you: for the most part they will depend entirely upon you; and if you feed them not with the true word of life, if you be backward to stir them up out of their dead sleep of security, and to promote and forward them with all readiness and diligence, they will even be content to perish; and in such a case you cannot too seriously consider at whose hands their blood will reasonably and certainly be required.-As your own soul is concerned in it; and this it is ultimately, for the ministry will be your calling, and what you must be accountable for at the day of judgment. God grant that you may be able so to demean yourself, that you may be able to say on that day, I am free from the blood of all men.' But it is a thought deeply to be weighed, that the sin of unfaithfulness in a minister (and unfaithful he may be and quite beside his office, though a very decent sober man) will then appear with these three terrible aggravations-that he hath neglected his calling—that he hath signally betrayed the interests of the Redeemer's kingdom-that he hath been the great instrument of the ruin of very many souls; indeed he shall hardly think how many that day will reveal.
"2. A due consideration of what your conduct must