15 and that he "judge us in meat or in drink;' that eateth, let him not despise him that eateth not; and let not him that eateth not judge him that eateth.16 These things have I learned, thanks and praise be unto Thee, O my God and Master, who dost knock at my ears and enlighten my heart; deliver me out of all temptation. It is not the uncleanness of meat that I fear, but the uncleanness of lusting. I know that permission was granted unto Noah to eat every kind of flesh" that was good for food; 18 that Elias was fed with flesh; 19 that John, endued with a wonderful abstinence, was not polluted by the living creatures (that is, the locusts 20) which he fed on. I know, too, that Esau was deceived by a longing for lentiles," and that David took blame to himself for desiring water," and that our King was tempted not by flesh but bread. And the people in the wilderness, therefore, also deserved reproof, not because they desired flesh, but because, in their desire for food, they murmured against the Lord." Thou give us; and what good soever we receive before we prayed for it, do we receive from Thee, and that we might afterwards know this did we receive it from Thee. Drunkard was I never, but I have known drunkards to be made sober men by Thee. Thy doing, then, was it, that they who never were such might not be so, as from Thee it was that they who have been so heretofore might not remain so always; and from Thee, too, was it, that both might know from whom it was. I heard another voice of Thine, "Go not after thy lusts, but refrain thyself from thine appetites. " And by Thy favour have I heard this saying likewise, which I have much delighted in, "Neither if | we eat, are we the better; neither if we eat not, are we the worse;" which is to say, that neither shall the one make me to abound, nor the other to be wretched. I heard also another voice, "For I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content, I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound. . . . I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me." Lo! a soldier of the celestial campnot dust as we are. But remember, O Lord, "that we are dust," and that of dust Thou hast created man; and he "was lost, and is found." Nor could he do this of his own power, seeing that he whom I so loved, saying these things through the afflatus of Thy inspiration, was of that same dust. "I can," saith he, "do all things through Him which strengtheneth me." Strengthen me, that I may be able. Give what Thou commandest, and command what Thou wilt. He confesses to have received, and when he glorieth, he glorieth in the Lord. Another have I heard entreating that he might receive,—“ Take from me," saith he," the greediness of the belly;"'10 by which it appeareth, O my holy God, that Thou givest when what Thou commandest to be done is done. 46. Thou hast taught me, good Father, that "unto the pure all things are pure; "" but "it is evil for that man who eateth with offence;"' 12 "and that every creature of Thine is good, and nothing to be refused, if it be received with thanksgiving;' '' 18 and that "meat commendeth us not to God; "'" and that no man should 1 Ecclus. xviii. 30. 21 Cor. viii. 8. 3 Phil. iv. 11-14. 4 Ps. ciii. 14. 5 Gen. iii. 19. Luke xv. 32. 7 Phil. iv. 13. 5 In his De Dono Persev. sec. 53, he tells us that these words were quoted to Pelagius, when at Rome, by a certain bishop, and that they excited him to contradict them so warmly as nearly to result in a rupture between Pelagius and the bishop. 91 Cor. i. 31. 10 Ecclus. xxiii. 6. 11 Titus i. 15. 12 Rom. xiv. 20. 131 Tim. iv. 4. 141 Cor. viii. 8. 23 47. Placed, then, in the midst of these temptations, I strive daily against longing for food and drink. For it is not of such a nature as that I am able to resolve to cut it off once for all, and not touch it afterwards, as I was able to do with concubinage. The bridle of the throat, therefore, is to be held in the mean of slackness and tightness.25 And who, O Lord, is he who is not in some degree carried away beyond the bounds of necessity? Whoever he is, he is great; let him magnify Thy name. But I am not such a one, "for I am a sinful man." 26 Yet do I also magnify Thy name; and He who hath "overcome the world" " maketh intercession to Thee for my sins,28 accounting me among the "feeble members" of His body," because Thine eyes saw that of him which was imperfect; and in Thy book all shall be written.30 CHAP. XXXII.-OF THE CHARMS OF PERFUMES not so attend on reason as to follow her WHICH ARE MORE EASILY OVERCOME. At any 48. With the attractions of odours I am not much troubled. When absent I do not seek them; when present I do not refuse them; and am prepared ever to be without them. rate thus I appear to myself; perchance I am deceived. For that also is a lamentable darkness wherein my capacity that is in me is concealed, so that my mind, making inquiry into herself concerning her own powers, not readily to credit herself; because that which is already in it is, for the most part, concealed, unless experience reveal it. And no man ought to feel secure1 in this life, the whole of which is called a temptation, that he, who could be made better from worse, may not also from better be made worse. Our sole hope, our sole confidence, our sole assured promise, is Thy mercy. 2 ventures CHAP. XXXIII.-HE OVERCAME THE PLEASURES OF THE EAR, ALTHOUGH IN THE CHURCH HE FREQUENTLY DELIGHTED IN THE SONG, NOT IN THE THING SUNG. 49. The delights of the ear had more powerfully inveigled and conquered me, but Thou didst unbind and liberate me. Now, in those airs which Thy words breathe soul into, when sung with a sweet and trained voice, do I somewhat repose; yet not so as to cling to them, but so as to free myself when I wish. But with the words which are their life do they, that they may gain admission into me, strive after a place of some honour in my heart; and I can hardly assign them a fitting one. Sometimes I appear to myself to give them more respect than is fitting, as I perceive that our minds are more devoutly and earnestly elevated into a flame of piety by the holy words themselves when they are thus sung, than when they are not; and that all affections of our spirit, by their own diversity, have their appropriate measures in the voice and singing, wherewith by I know not what secret relationship they are stimulated. But the gratification of my flesh, to which the mind ought never to be given over to be enervated, often beguiles me, while the sense does 1 "For some,' says Thomas Taylor (Works, vol. 1. "Christ's patiently; but having gained admission merely for her sake, it strives even to run on before her, and be her leader. Thus in these things do I sin unknowing, but afterwards do I know it. 50. Sometimes, again, avoiding very earnestly this same deception, I err out of too great preciseness; and sometimes so much as to deDavid's Psalter is often used, be banished both sire that every air of the pleasant songs to which from my ears and those of the Church itself; and that way seemed unto me safer which I remembered to have been often related to me of Athanasius, Bishop of Alexandria, who obliged the reader of the psalm to give utterance to it with so slight an inflection of voice, that it was more like speaking than singing. standing, when I call to mind the tears I shed at the songs of Thy Church, at the outset of my Notwith recovered faith, and how even now I am moved not by the singing but by what is sung, when they are sung with a clear and skilfully modulated voice, I then acknowledge the great utility of this custom. Thus vacillate I between dangerous pleasure and tried soundness; being inclined rather (though I pronounce no irrevocable opinion upon the subject) to approve of the use of singing in the church, that so by the delights of the ear the weaker minds may be stimulated to a devotional frame. Yet when it happens to me to be more moved by the singing than by what is sung, I confess myself to have sinned criminally, and then I would rather not have heard the singing. See now the condition I am in! Weep with me, and weep for me, you who so control your inward feelings as that good results ensue. As for you who do not thus act, these things concern you not. But Thou, O Lord my God, give ear, behold and see, and have mercy upon me, and heal me, Thou, in whose sight I am become a puzzle to myself; and "this is my infirmity." CHAP. XXXIV.—OF THE VERY DANGEROUS ALLURE MENTS OF THE EYES; ON ACCOUNT OF BEAUTY OF FORM, GOD, THE CREATOR, IS TO BE PRAISED. 51. There remain the delights of these eyes of my flesh, concerning which to make my confessions in the hearing of the ears of Thy temTemptation," p. 11), "through vain prefidence of God's protec-ple, those fraternal and devout ears; and so to tion, run in times of contagion into infected houses, which upon just calling a man may: but for one to run out of his calling in the way of an ordinary visitation, he shall find that God's angels have commission to protect him no longer than he is in his way (Ps. xci. 11), and that being out of it, this arrow of the Lord shall sooner hit him than another that is not half so confident." We should not, as Fuller quaintly says, "hollo in the ears of a sleeping temptation; and when we are tempted, let us remember that if (Hibbert, Syntagma Theologicum, p. 342) “a giant knock while the door is shut, he may with ease be still kept out; but if once open, that he gets in but a limb of himself, then there is no course left to keep out the remaining bulk." See also Augustin on Peter's case, De Cor rept. et Grat. c. 9. 2 Job vii. 1, Old Vers. See p. 153, note 1. conclude the temptations of "the lust of the flesh "5 which still assail me, groaning and desiring to be clothed upon with my house from heaven. The eyes delight in fair and varied forms, and bright and pleasing colours. 6 3 Ps. vi. 2. 4 Ps. lxxvii. 10. 1 John ii. 16. 6 2 Cor. v. 2. Suffer not these to take possession of my soul; let far beyond necessary and moderate use and God rather possess it, He who made these things holy signification, have men added for the en"very good" indeed; yet is He my good, thralment of the eyes; following outwardly not these. And these move me while awake, what they make, forsaking inwardly Him by during the day; nor is rest from them granted whom they were made, yea, and destroying me, as there is from the voices of melody, some- that which they themselves were made! But I, times, in silence, from them all. For that O my God and my Joy, do hence also sing a queen of colours, the light, flooding all that we hymn unto Thee, and offer a sacrifice of praise look upon, wherever I be during the day, glid- unto my Sanctifier," because those beautiful ing past me in manifold forms, doth soothe me patterns, which through the medium of men's when busied about other things, and not notic- souls are conveyed into their artistic hands,1o ing it. And so strongly doth it insinuate itself, emanate from that Beauty which is above our that if it be suddenly withdrawn it is looked for souls, which my soul sigheth after day and longingly, and if long absent doth sadden the night. But as for the makers and followers of those outward beauties, they from thence derive the way of approving them, but not of using them." And though they see Him not, yet is He there, that they might not go astray, but keep their strength for Thee," and not dissipate it upon delicious lassitudes. And I,. though I both say and perceive this, impede my course with such beauties, but Thou dost rescue me, O Lord, Thou dost rescue me; "for Thy loving-kindness is before mine eyes."'13 For I am taken miserably, and Thou rescuest me mercifully; sometimes not perceiving it, in that I had come upon them hesitatingly; at other times with pain, because I was held fast by them. mind. CHAP. XXXV.-ANOTHER KIND OF TEMPTATION IS CURIOSITY, WHICH IS STIMULATED BY THE 52. O Thou Light, which Tobias saw,' when, his eyes being closed, he taught his son the way of life; himself going before with the feet of charity, never going astray. Or that which Isaac saw, when his fleshly "eyes were dim, so that he could not see" by reason of old age; it was permitted him, not knowingly to bless his sons, but in blessing them to know them. Or that which Jacob saw, when he too, blind through great age, with an enlightened heart, in the persons of his own sons, threw light upon the races of the future people, presignified in them; and laid his hands, mystically crossed, upon his grandchildren by Joseph, not as their father, looking outwardly, corrected them, but as he himself distinguished them. This is the light, the only one, and all those who see and love it are one. But that corporeal light of which I was speaking seasoneth the life of the world for her blind lovers, with a tempting and of temptation, more complex in its peril. For 54. In addition to this there is another form fatal sweetness. But they who know how to besides that concupiscence of the flesh which praise Thee for it, "O God, the world's great lieth in the gratification of all senses and pleasArchitect," take it up in Thy hymn, and are not taken up with it in their sleep. Such de- perish," there pertaineth to the soul, through de-ures, wherein its slaves who "are far from Thee sire I to be. I resist seductions of the eyes, the same senses of the body, a certain vain and lest my feet with which I advance on Thy way curious longing, cloaked under the name of be entangled; and I raise my invisible eyes to knowledge and learning, not of having pleasure Thee, that Thou wouldst be pleased to "pluck in the flesh, but of making experiments through my feet out of the net." Thou dost continu- the flesh. This longing, since it originates in ally pluck them out, for they are ensnared. an appetite for knowledge, and the sight being Thou never ceasest to pluck them out, but I the chief amongst the senses in the acquisition constantly remain fast in the snares set all of knowledge, is called in divine language, around me; because Thou "that keepest Israel the lust of the eyes.' For seeing belongeth shall neither slumber nor sleep.' 118 to the other senses also, when we exercise them properly to the eyes; yet we apply this word in the search after knowledge. For we do not say, Listen how it glows, smell how it glistens, taste how it shines, or feel how it flashes, since all these are said to be seen. And yet we say 53. What numberless things, made by divers arts and manufactures, both in our apparel, shoes, vessels, and every kind of work, in picturės, too, and sundry images, and these going 1 Gen. i. 31. Tobit iv. 3 Gen. xxvii. 1. 4 Gen. xlviii, 13-19. * From the beginning of the hymn of St. Ambrose, part of which is quoted, ix. sec. 32, above. Assumunt eam, in hymno tuo, non absumuntur ab ea. 7 Ps. xxv. 15. 8 Ps. cxxi. 4. 14 15 9 Sanctificatori meo, but some MSS. have sacrificatori. 10 See xí, sec. 7, and note, below. 11 See note 6, sec. 40, above. 12 Ps. lviii. 10, Vulg. 13 Ps. xxvi. 3. 14 Ps. lxiii. 27. 15 1 John ii. 16. not only, See how it shineth, which the eyes alone can perceive; but also, See how it soundeth, see how it smelleth, see how it tasteth, see how hard it is. And thus the general experience of the senses, as was said before, is termed "the lust of the eyes," because the function of seeing, wherein the eyes hold the pre-eminence, the other senses by way of similitude take possession of, whensoever they seek out any knowledge. 55. But by this is it more clearly discerned, when pleasure and when curiosity is pursued by the senses; for pleasure follows after objects that are beautiful, melodious, fragrant, savoury, soft; but curiosity, for experiment's sake, seeks the contrary of these,-not with a view of undergoing uneasiness, but from the passion of experimenting upon and knowing them. For what pleasure is there to see, in a lacerated corpse, that which makes you shudder? And yet if it lie near, we flock thither, to be made sad, and to turn pale. Even in sleep they fear lest they should see it. Just as if when awake any one compelled them to go and see it, or any report of its beauty had attracted them! Thus also is it with the other senses, which it were tedious to pursue. From this malady of curiosity are all those strange sights exhibited in the theatre. Hence do we proceed to search out the secret powers of nature (which is beside our end), which to know profits not,' and wherein men desire nothing but to know. Hence, too, with that same end of perverted knowledge we consult magical arts. Hence, again, even in religion itself, is God tempted, when signs and wonders are eagerly asked of Him, not desired for any saving end, but to make trial only. 56. In this so vast a wilderness, replete with snares and dangers, lo, many of them have I lopped off, and expelled from my heart, as Thou, O God of my salvation, hast enabled me to do. And yet when dare I say, since so many things of this kind buzz around our daily life, when dare I say that no such thing makes me intent to see it, or creates in me vain solicitude? It is true that the theatres never now carry me away, nor do I now care to know the courses of the stars, nor hath my soul at any time consulted departed spirits; all sacrilegious oaths I abhor. O Lord my God, to whom I owe all humble and single-hearted service, with what subtlety of suggestion does the enemy influence me to require some sign from Thee! But by our King, and by our pure and chaste country Jerusalem, I beseech Thee, that as any consenting unto such thoughts is far from me, so may it always be farther and farther. But when I entreat Thee for the salvation of any, the end I aim at is far otherwise, and Thou who doest what Thou wilt, givest and wilt give me willingly to "follow" Thee." 3 57. Nevertheless, in how many most minute and contemptible things is our curiosity daily tempted, and who can number how often we succumb? How often, when people are narrating idle tales, do we begin by tolerating them, lest we should give offence unto the weak; and then gradually we listen willingly! I do not now-a-days go to the circus to see a dog chasing a hare; but if by chance I pass such a coursing in the fields, it possibly distracts me even from some serious thought, and draws me after it, not that I turn the body of my beast aside, but the inclination of my mind. And except Thou, by demonstrating to me my weakness, dost speedily warn me, either through the sight itself, by some reflection to rise to Thee, or wholly to despise and pass it by, I, vain one, am absorbed by it. How is it, when sitting at home, a lizard catching flies, or a spider entangling them as they rush into her nets, oftentimes arrests me? Is the feeling of curiosity not the same because these are such tiny creatures? From them I proceed to praise Thee, the wonderful Creator and Disposer of all things; but it is not this that first attracts my attention. It is one thing to get up quickly, and another not to fall, and of such things is my life full; and my only hope is in Thy exceeding great mercy. For when this heart of ours is made the receptacle of such things, and bears crowds of this abounding vanity, then are our prayers often interrupted and disturbed thereby; and whilst in Thy presence we direct the voice of our heart to Thine ears, this so great a matter is broken off by the influx of I know not what idle thoughts. CHAP. XXXVI.—A THIRD KIND IS "PRIDE," WHICH IS PLEASING TO MAN, NOT TO GOD. such things as are to be lightly esteemed, or 58. Shall we, then, account this too amongst shall anything restore us to hope, save Thy complete mercy, since Thou hast begun to change us? And Thou knowest to what extent Thou hast already changed me, Thou who 1 Augustin's great end was to attain the knowledge of God. Hence, in his Soliloquia, i. 7, we read: "Deum et animam scire cupio. Nihilne plus? Nihil omnino." And he only esteemed the knowledge of physical laws so far as they would lead to Him. (See v. sec. 7, above, and the note there.) In his De Ordine, ii. 14, 15, etc., writing at the time of his conversion, he had contended that the knowledge of the liberal sciences would lead to a knowledge of 3 In allusion to those venatios, or hunting scenes, in which the the divine wisdom; but in his Retractations (i. 3, sec. 2) he regrets less savage animals were slain. These were held in the circus, this, pointing out that while many holy men have not this know-which was sometimes planted for the occasion, so as to resemble a ledge, many who have it are not holy. Compare also Enchir. c. forest. See Smith's Greek and Roman Antiquities, under “ Vena16; Serm. lxviii. 1, 2; and De Civ. Dei, ix. 22. tio," and vi. sec. 13, note, above. John xxi. 22. than that he possesses the gift for which he is praised, such a one is praised while Thou blamest. And better truly is he who praised than the one who was praised. For the gift of God in man was pleasing to the one, while the other was better pleased with the gift of man than that of God. first healest me of the lust of vindicating myself, that so Thou mightest forgive all my remaining "iniquities,' and heal all my "diseases," and redeem my life from corruption, and crown me with "loving-kindness and tender mercies," and satisfy my desire with "good things; who didst restrain my pride with Thy fear, and subdue my neck to Thy "yoke." And now I bear it, and it is "light" "'" unto me, CHAP. XXXVII. HE IS FORCIBLY GOADED ON because so hast Thou promised, and made it, and so in truth it was, though I knew it not, when I feared to take it up. But, O Lord,Thou who alone reignest without pride, because Thou art the only true Lord, who hast no lord, -hath this third kind of temptation left me, or can it leave me during this life? 59. The desire to be feared and loved of men, with no other view than that I may experience a joy therein which is no joy, is a miserable life, and unseemly ostentation. Hence especially it arises that we do not love Thee, nor devoutly fear Thee. And therefore dost Thou resist the proud, but givest grace unto the humble; and Thou thunderest upon the ambitious designs of the world, and "the foundations of the hills" tremble. Because now certain offices of human society render it necessary to be loved and feared of men, the adversary of our true blessedness presseth hard upon us, everywhere scattering his snares of "well done, well done;" that while acquiring them eagerly, we may be caught unawares, and disunite our joy from Thy truth, and fix it on the deceits of men; and take pleasure in being loved and feared, not for Thy sake, but in Thy stead, by which means, being made like unto him, he may have them as his, not in harmony of love, but in the fellowship of punishment; who aspired to exalt his throne in the north, that dark and cold they might serve him, imitating Thee in perverse and distorted ways. But we, O Lord, lo, we are Thy "little flock;" do Thou possess us, stretch Thy wings over us, and let us take refuge under them. Be Thou our glory; let us be loved for Thy sake, and Thy word feared in us. They who desire to be commended of men when Thou blamest, will not be defended of men when Thou judgest; nor will they be delivered when Thou condemnest. But when not the sinner is praised in the desires of his soul, nor he blessed who doeth unjustly, but a man is praised for some gift that Thou hast bestowed upon him, and he is more gratified at the praise for himself, BY THE LOVE OF PRAISE. "secret 60. By these temptations, O Lord, are we daily tried; yea, unceasingly are we tried. Our daily furnace" is the human tongue. And in this respect also dost Thou command us to be continent. Give what Thou commandest, and command what Thou wilt. Regarding this matter, Thou knowest the groans of my heart, and the rivers' of mine eyes. For I am not able to ascertain how far I am clean of this plague, and I stand in great fear of my faults, "10 which Thine eyes perceive, though mine do not. For in other kinds of temptations I have some sort of power of examining myself; but in this, hardly any. For, both as regards the pleasures of the flesh and an idle curiosity, I see how far I have been able to hold my mind in check when I do without them, either voluntarily or by reason of their not being at hand; for then I inquire of myself how much more or less troublesome it is to me not to have them. Riches truly which are sought for in order that they may minister to some one of these three "lusts," 12 or to two, or the whole of them, if the mind be not able to see clearly whether, when it hath them, it despiseth them, they may be cast on one side, that so it may prove itself. But if we desire to test our power of doing without praise, need we live ill, and that so flagitiously and immoderately as that every one who knows us shall detest us? What greater madness than this can be either said or conceived? But if praise both is wont and ought to be the companion of a good life and of good works, we should as little forego its companionship as a good life itself. unless a thing be absent, I do not know whether I shall be contented or troubled at being without it. But 61. What, then, do I confess unto Thee, O Lord, in this kind of temptation? What, save that I am delighted with praise, but more with the truth itself than with praise? For were I to have my choice, whether I had rather, being 8 Isa. xlviii. 10, and Prov. xxvii. 21. 10 Ps. xix. 12. See note 5, page 47, above. 11 In his De Vera Relig. sec. 92, he points out that adversity also, when it comes to a good man, will disclose to him how far his heart is set on worldly things: "Hoc enim sine amore nostro aderat, quod sine dolore discedit.' 12 1 John ii. 16. See beginning of sec. 41, above. |