Hence this story comes to us,

Of which some people make such fuss,
About the eastern Magi.

THE TALE OF THE MONK AND JEW

VERSIFIED.

An unbelieving Jew one day
Was skating o'er the icy way,
Which being brittle let him in,
Just deep enough to catch his chin;
And in that woful plight he hung,
With only power to move his tongue.
A brother skater near at hand,
A Papist born in foreign land,
With hasty strokes directly flew
To save poor Mordecai the Jew—
But first, quoth he, I must enjoin
That you renounce your faith for mine;
There's no entreaties else will do,
'Tis heresy to help a Jew——

"Forswear mine fait! No! Cot forbid!

Dat would be fery base indeed,

Come never mind such tings as deeze,

Tink, tink, how fery hard it freeze.
More coot you do, more coot you be,
Vat signifies your fait to me.
Come tink agen, how cold and vet,

And help me out von little bit."

By holy mass, 'tis hard, I own,
To see a man both hang and drown,
And can't relieve him from his pligh
Because he is an Israelite;

The church refuses all assistance,
Beyond a certain pale and distance;

Is praying for your soul my friend.

"Pray for mine soul, ha! ha! you make me laugh, You petter help me out py half:

Mine soul I farrant vill take care,

To pray for her own self my tear;
So tink a little now for me,

'Tis I am in de hole, not she."

The church forbids it, friend, and saith That all shall die who have no faith. "Vell, if I must pelieve, I must,

But help me out von little first."

No, not an inch without Amen.
That seals the whole-"Vell, hear me den,
I here renounce for coot and all,
De race of Jews both great and small;
'Tis de varst trade peneath the sun,
Or varst religion; dat's all vun.
Dey cheat, and get deir living py't,
And lie, and swear de lie is right.
I'll co to mass as soon as ever
I get to toder side de river.

So help me out, dow Christian friend,
Dat I may do as I intend."

Perhaps you do intend to cheat,
If once you get upon your feet.
"No, no, I do intend to be
A Christian, such a one as dee."
For, thought the Jew, he is as much
A Christian man as I am such.

The bigot Papist joyful hearted
To hear the heretic converted,
Replied to the designing Jew,
This was a happy fall for you:
You'd better die a Christian now,
For if you live you'll break your vow.
Then said no more, but in a trice
Popp'd Mordecai beneath the ice.

ATLANTICUS.

CASE OF THE OFFICERS OF EXCISE; WITH REMARKS ON THE QUALIFICATIONS OF OFFICERS, AND ON THE NUMEROUS EVILS ARISING TO THE REVENUE, FROM THE INSUFFICIENCY OF THE PRESENT SALARY: HUMBLY ADDRESSED TO THE MEMBERS OF BOTH HOUSES OF PARLIAMENT.

Introduction.

As a design among the Excise officers throughout the kingdom is on foot, for an humble application to parliament next session, to have the state of their salaries taken into consideration; it has been judged not only expedient, but highly necessary, to present a state of their case, previous to the presentation of their petition.

There are some cases so singularly reasonable, that the more they are considered, the more weight they obtain. It is a strong evidence both of simplicity and honest confidence, when petitioners in any case ground their hopes of relief on having their case fully and perfectly known and understood.

Simple as this subject may appear at first, it is a matter, in my humble opinion, not unworthy a parliamentary attention. It is a subject interwoven with a variety of reasons from different causes. New matter will arise on every thought. If the poverty of the officers of Excise, if the temptations arising from their poverty, if the qualifications of persons to be admitted into employment, if the security of the revenue itself, are matters of any weight, then I am conscious that my voluntary services in this business, will produce some good effect or other, either to the better security of the revenue, the relief of the officers, or both.

WHEN a year's salary is mentioned in the gross, it acquires a degree of consequence from its sound, which it would not if separated into daily payments, and if the charges attending the receiving,