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In vain, recorded in historic page,
So when a child, as playful children use,
OF AN ADJUDGED CASE, NOT TO BE FOUND IN ANY
OF THE BOOKS.
BETWEEN Nose and yes a strange contest arose,
The spectacles set them unhappily wrong; The point in dispute was, as all the world knows,
To which the said spectacles ought to belong. So Tongue was the lawyer, and argued the cause
With a great deal of skill, and a wig full of learning; While chief baron Ear, sat to balance the laws,
So fam’d for his talent in nicely discerning. “ In behalf of the Nose it will quickly appear, And your lordship,” he said, “ will undoubtedly
find, That the Nose has had spectacles always in wear,
Which amounts to possession time out of mind.” Then holding the spectacles up to the court“ Your lordship observes they are made with a
straddle, As wide as the ridge of the Nose is; in short, Design'd to sit close to it, just like a saddle.
Again, would your lordship a moment suppose ("T'is a case that has happen'd, and may be again) That the visage or countenance had not a Nose, Pray who would, or who could, wear spectacles
then? “On the whole it appears, and my argument shows,
With a reasoning the court will never condemn, That the spectacles plainly were made for the Nose,
And the Nose was as plainly intended for them.” Then shifting his side (as a lawyer knows how),
He pleaded again in behalf of the Eyes :
For the court did not think they were equally wise. So his lordship decreed, with a grave, solemn tone,
Decisive and clear, without one if or but “ That, whenever the Nose put his spectacles on,
By daylight or candlelight - Eyes should be shut !”
ON THE BURNING OF
TOGETHER WITH HIS MSS.,
By the Mob, in the month of June, 1780.
Sworn foes to sense and law,
And many a treasure more,
That grac'd his letter'd store.
The loss was his alone;
The burning of his own.
ON THE SAME.
In all-devouring flame,
And bid us fear the same.
They felt the rude alarm,
His sacred head from harm.
From Flora's balmy store,
Had treasur'd up before.
Have done him cruel wrong;
The honey on his tongue.*
THE LOVE OF THE WORLD REPROVED;
OR, HYPOCRISY DETECTED.
From the whole hog to be debarr'd; * Lord Mansfield bore the loss of his library with grcat calmness, and once, in the House of Lords, made the following pathetic allusion to it, when giving his opinion on a legal question; "I speak not this from books, for books I have pone." - Ed.
And set their wit at work to find
You laugh—'tis well-The tale applied May make you laugh on tother side. “Renounce the world”—the preacher cries. “ We do” !-a multitude replies. While one as innocent regards A snug and friendly game at cards; And one,
whatever you may say, Can see no evil in a play; Some love a concert, or a race; And others shooting, and the chase. Revil'd and loy'd, renounc'd and follow'd, Thus, bit by bit, the world is swallow'd; Each thinks his neighbour makes too free, Yet likes a slice as well as he; With sophistry their sauce they sweeten, Till quite from tail to snout 'tis eaten.
ON THE DEATH
0, share Maria's grief !
Assassin'd by a thief.
Where Rhenus strays his vines among,
And, though by nature mute,
a whistle blest,
Of flagelet or flute.
His bosom of the hue
To sweep away the dew.
No cat had leave to dwell ;
Large-built, and lattic'd well.
For Bully's plumage sake,
The swains their baskets make.
Subsistence to provide,
And badger-colour'd hide. He, ent'ring at the study door, Its ample area 'gan explore;
And something in the wind Conjectur'd, snilling round and round, Better than all the books he found,
Food chiefly for the mind.